ORDERING PIZZA In 2021
This is a new kind of blog for me. I read this piece and couldn't resist republishing it on my blog. It speaks volumes about the lack of security for our personal information. Before long, Google will know our thoughts -- even in advance of having them. It's scary times indeed.
CALLER: Is this Pizza Delight?
GOOGLE: No sir, it’s Google Pizza.
CALLER: I must have dialed a wrong number. Sorry.
GOOGLE: No sir, Google bought Pizza Delight last month.
CALLER: OK. I would like to order a pizza.
GOOGLE: Do you want your usual, sir?
CALLER: My usual? You know me?
GOOGLE: According to our ID data sheet, the last 12 times you called you ordered an extra-large pizza with three cheeses, sausage, pepperoni, mushrooms and meatballs on a thick crust.
CALLER: OK! That’s what I want…
GOOGLE: May I suggest that this time your order a pizza with ricotta, arugula, sun-dried tomatoes and olives on a whole wheat gluten-free thin crust?
CALLER: What! I detest vegetables!
CALLER: How the hell do you know?!
GOOGLE: Well, we cross-referenced your home phone number with your medical records. We have the results of your blood tests for the last 7 years.
GOOGLE: Excuse me sir, but you have not taken your medication regularly. According to our database, you purchased a bottle of 30 cholesterol tablets once, at Drug RX Network, 4 months ago.
CALLER: Well, I bought more from another drugstore.
GOOGLE: That doesn’t show on your credit card statement.
CALLER: I paid in cash, OK?
GOOGLE: But you did not withdraw enough cash according to your bank statement.
CALLER: Well, I have other sources of cash.
GOOGLE: That doesn’t show on your last tax return unless you bought them using an undeclared income source, which is against the law.
CALLER: WHAT THE HELL!!!
GOOGLE: I am sorry, sir, we use such information only with the sole intention of helping you.
CALLER: Enough already! I am sick to death of Google, Facebook, Twitter, WhatsApp and all the others. I am going to an island without Internet, cable TV, where there is no cell phone service and no one to watch me or spy on me.
GOOGLE: I understand sir, but you will need to renew your passport first. It expired 6 weeks ago…
In the spirit of the New Year, during the month of January I am giving away free signed copies of my book, Beyond Happiness and Meaning: Transforming Your Life Through Ethical Behavior, to the first ten people who contact me at: email@example.com and provide a mailing address. May your 2021 be better than 2020. Let's face it, it can't be worse!
Posted by Dr. Steven Mintz, aka Ethics Sage, on January 19, 2021. You can sign up for his newsletter and learn more about his activities at: https://www.stevenmintzethics.com/. Follow him on Facebook at: https://www.facebook.com/StevenMintzEthics and on Twitter at: https://twitter.com/ethicssage.