Please Be Considerate of Others

Pet peeves are annoying behaviors that other people do, and which irritate someone. Pet peeves are particularly irritating because they often tap into our values, preferences, or past experiences. When something bothers us, it can feel like a personal affront, even if it seems trivial to others.

I’ve been thinking a lot about them lately because I have experienced that increasingly people are inconsiderate; they don’t seem to be cognizant that even the little things can annoy others. I decided to write a blog on this subject because of my commitment to ethical behavior in our personal as well as professional lives. Being considerate of others is an ethical value because it shows caring and concern for the well-being of others. It moves us away from the constant pursuit of self-interest regardless of how it affects others.

I’ve asked many people about pet peeves and have concluded that some personal peeves might bother one person immensely, while someone else might never notice or be bothered by it. I’ve also learned that the reactions of those who are offended by the pet-peeve-action varies from combative to indifference.

Examples of My Pet Peeves

In the interests of brevity, I am limiting my list to my top ten pet peeves. I’ve also made some personal reflections in parenthesis.

10. Leaving the toilet seat up [a shout out to women].

9. Turning without signaling. [what’s the turn signal for?].

8. Walking up a flight of stairs while using one’s cell phones; being oblivious to others [this can cause them to run into us].

7. Talking during movies or using one’s cell phones. [even though there is a message from the theater not to do so].

6. Looking at one’s cell phone while someone is talking [inconsiderate].

5. Cutting people off while driving [stupid; you can cause a serious accident],

4.  Failing to share the arm rest on an airplane [thoughtless].Taking one’s shoes (and socks!) off in an airplane [yuck].

3. Taking one's shoe's (and socks!) off in an airplane.

2. Being interrupted by another person while talking [rude! rude! behavior].

1. Using the catchphrase “with all due respect” [a subtle disrespect].

I realize my #1 pet peeve may be something others disagree with and may even do themselves. However, for me oftentimes it precedes a disagreement or criticism, even though its intended meaning is of polite dissent; essentially, saying "with all due respect" can often signal that you are about to disagree with someone, regardless of whether you try to soften the blow with the phrase.

I suppose #1 irks me so much because I have been the target of this statement all-too-often in my life. This is because I’ve been in an authority position many times and those lower in the food chain would use the expression sarcastically to mean the exact opposite of what it states.

You may disagree with this list—that’s fine. Feel free to comment and add to the conversation.

Posted by Steven Mintz, aka Ethics Sage, on December 11, 2024. You can sign up for his newsletter and learn more about his activities at: https://www.stevenmintzethics.com/.